My objection is with the quote on page 95 starting "if self-love..." I feel that this untrue as it does not propertly represent love. He states that love can engross a person, i do not believe that to be true. Love is a strong connection and thought by most to enrich and fulfil life. i assume that by "engrossed" the writer means that it controls a person entire self. if self love then is a connection that one has to him or herself then that relationship cannot take up a persons entire being. Farther than that, i believe that love cannot take up any portion of a persons being as it is an enriching experience and can therefore only encance a person understanding. Adams seems to believe that a person can only love as much as they can fit in their self, however my view is that a person can only love as much as they are able to allow themselves to grow.
That being said, i find that self love is as valid a form of enrichment as love for another. A person will never be able to fully understand themselves however they can always grow to know more and more about themselves. Self love is a discovery of ones own self and therefore is enriching and can only cause a person to groe.
What Adams seems to think is that a person can love themselves to the point where they lack the ability to see others. While it is possible for a person to have self love and be selfish they are 2 exclusive character traits and should not be grouped together.
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I fail to see how self-love cannot engross a person. This is what we call narcissism, Tthose individuals who are thoroughly in love with themselves, and blind to all others.
I believe you have a definition of love that is different than Adams. I think the love that he thinks of is one of the most powerful emotions that a human can possess. I find that you only see the good side of love. Love is an emotion that engulfs the heart and soul, one that can lead to death and destruction (Romeo and Juliet) to one that can save lives (a mother and child bond). If an emotion that is only an enriching experience, or enhance a person's understanding then I don't believe it will lead to all of these tragic or amazing ends. Love than is not as powerful, but it has been show time and time again the lengths that people will go through for the one’s they love.
If you define that a person can only love as much as they are able to allow themselves to grow, then it would follow that a person has the most love as child, and our love will decrease as we grow older. This is because as we grow older, we don't grow as much or allow ourselves to grow for most people. As adults we have reached a point in our lives where our personalities and human growth has ended.
I don't believe that self-love is a discovery of one's own self. Because then what would you call acceptance of one's own self if not love. Self-love is more encompassing than you find it to be. Self-love is not only about discovery of the self, but also acceptance, respect, and self-worth that allows us to assertive.
I think what Adams says is possible, that someone that is so invested in themselves is unable to see others and so his self-loved is pushed to the extreme. Any kind of emotion can be pushed to an extreme where it will be all consuming as shown by Taylor. These are two different character traits, but any two characters traits can be grouped together.
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